Compassion
A Personal Reflection by Pat Branco

Compassion is an inner feeling. It’s how we feel about others as we put ourselves in their position, walk in their shoes, and see the good. It’s our outward demonstration of that inner feeling when one soul touches another soul through personal contact – looking each other in the eye or through the laying on of hands. It’s a powerful moment of caring made through a physical, electrical, personal connection with another person. It’s the care that we provide and that empathy behind the care. 

It’s very easy for us to be compassionate for the young. We can all warm our hearts to a sweet, innocent baby coming through a particularly trying illness, or a young man who’s just been diagnosed with a terminal illness. It’s much more difficult to show our humanity and compassion for people who are not the vision of perfection—the people who are homeless, smell bad, are angry at us in the situations that brought them to us. Yet they’re the ones who actually need our compassion in a much more visible way.  They’re searching for care and aren’t ready to accept it. So it takes an extra special person to lean in and say, “Go ahead. I understand you’re afraid and I understand you’re angry, but we’re here to help and I can help you get through this. And you may not appreciate it today. That’s okay.”

We are all feeling people, and an expression of care and compassion is an expression of that feeling. But by putting ourselves in someone else’s shoes, connecting with them, and showing them our humanity we accept some personal risk. I love Disraeli’s comment, “Never apologize for showing feeling, for when you do so you apologize for the truth.”  In this seemingly simple statement, Disraeli is acknowledging that we try to control our expressions of feelings – perhaps because they’re tough to control, or because it seems so risky – yet we shouldn’t. Expressing compassion is not something to be afraid of. The return on the investment far outweighs the risk.

The stoic, hard-faced leader, able to bravely shoulder the world, undaunted by the day’s issues, who bravely marching forward doesn’t really cut it. People need to see the humanity of their leaders and why they’re emotionally invested in the organization they work for. At Peace Health, if we isolate ourselves in a sea of administrative paperwork, we miss the patient connection. Only when we invest ourselves in the care we provide, that humanity of the moment, and actually get out on the floor and see the care given in a compassionate way – can we really show our own compassion for patients, staff, and our peers and really share that entire experience.